Colchester

Wednesday | 20:00-22:00

United Way Colchester, CO4 5UP

Welcome to MAN v FAT Colchester. Please feel free to sign up and your MAN v FAT coach will be in touch soon. (You will not be charged a monthly subscription of £35 until your place in the club is confirmed).

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Hello and welcome to MAN v FAT Football Colchester. The first step is often the most difficult and now you have taken that step I am looking forward to helping you on your weight loss journey.

Tom Irving , Coach, Colchester

see what our players have been up to

Leaderboard

Season Twenty-Seven | 2025
#
Team
Pl
W
Pts
1
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
10
7
14
2
Pork Vale (Blue)
10
7
14
3
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
10
7
14
4
Man Titty (Orange)
10
5
10
5
Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
10
3
6
6
Lardiff City (Black)
10
1
2

Latest league fixtures / results

P W D L F A GD PTS
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) 10 7 0 3 116 81 35 14
Pork Vale (Blue) 10 7 0 3 113 80 33 14
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) 10 7 0 3 105 92 13 14
Man Titty (Orange) 10 5 0 5 85 98 -13 10
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) 10 3 0 7 94 120 -26 6
Lardiff City (Black) 10 1 0 9 57 99 -42 2
P W D L F A GD PTS
Pork Vale (Blue) 10 8 1 1 78 41 37 17
Man Titty (Orange) 10 6 2 2 54 34 20 14
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) 10 6 1 3 65 42 23 13
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) 10 3 2 5 46 56 -10 8
Lardiff City (Black) 10 2 0 8 28 57 -29 4
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) 10 2 0 8 40 81 -41 4
P W D L F A GD PTS
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) 10 9 0 1 45 20 25 18
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) 10 6 1 3 41 21 20 13
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) 10 5 1 4 31 25 6 11
Pork Vale (Blue) 10 4 1 5 14 22 -8 9
Man Titty (Orange) 10 2 1 7 16 45 -29 5
Lardiff City (Black) 10 2 0 8 16 30 -14 4
Team Player Weight Score Loss Percentage
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Reece Currie 17.00 5.13%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) Jan Lawlor 17.00 2.87%
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Darren Smith 14.50 12.55%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) Paul Dolden 14.00 17.27%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) Toby Fox-Hammond 13.50 12.79%
Lardiff City (Black) Raj Nakum 12.00 6.00%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) Graham Lawlor 10.50 3.13%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) Calum Irvine 8.00 2.97%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) Peter Jenkins 8.00 0.44%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) David Langston 7.50 1.53%
Lardiff City (Black) Jon Graham 6.50 1.90%
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Andrew Fergus 6.00 7.95%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) Steve Bignell 6.00 5.05%
Pork Vale (Blue) Jonathan Nottage 6.00 4.31%
Lardiff City (Black) Dan Garrett 5.50 3.28%
Pork Vale (Blue) Paul Gibbs 5.50 2.09%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) Justin Boswick 5.00 4.53%
Man Titty (Orange) Greg Stephens 5.00 2.86%
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Gary Robinson 5.00 0.10%
Man Titty (Orange) Mark Ferrari 4.50 0.88%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) nick towler 3.50 4.94%
Man Titty (Orange) Leigh Alston 3.50 1.20%
Man Titty (Orange) David Hogan 3.00 0.17%
Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow) James Gibbins 2.50 3.89%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) Warren Hallworth 2.50 0.68%
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Lee De’ath 2.50 0.44%
Pork Vale (Blue) Robert Skipper 2.50 0.11%
Man Titty (Orange) Milan Karadzic 2.00 -1.74%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) Paul Sheppard 1.50 0.59%
Pork Vale (Blue) Jamie Whiteside 1.00 1.39%
Ivory Cheese Toastie (White) ALI CAIRNS 1.00 1.34%
Lardiff City (Black) Thomas Nind 0.50 0.77%
Man Titty (Orange) Tony Harrison 0.50 0.31%
Lardiff City (Black) Russell Smith 0.50 0.09%
Kebaberdeen FC (Green) Gregg Davis 0.50 -0.69%

Upcoming Cup Matches

Recent Cup Match Results

  • Wednesday 16 April

    Lardiff City (Black)
    13 - 4
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    4 - 11
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    14 - 2
    Man Titty (Orange)

  • Wednesday 19 March

    Pork Vale (Blue)
    7 - 13
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    6 - 10
    Man Titty (Orange)
    Lardiff City (Black)
    8 - 9
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)

  • Wednesday 19 February

    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    15 - 12
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Lardiff City (Black)
    7 - -1
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    7 - 3
    Man Titty (Orange)

 

Tap score to see breakdown.

  • Wednesday 30 April

    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    15 - 7
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Lardiff City (Black)
    7 - 15
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    7 - 11
    Man Titty (Orange)

  • Wednesday 23 April

    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    8 - 14
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    11 - 12
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    6 - 5
    Lardiff City (Black)

  • Wednesday 09 April

    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    12 - 7
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    11 - 12
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    7 - 4
    Lardiff City (Black)

  • Wednesday 02 April

    Lardiff City (Black)
    3 - 10
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    6 - 13
    Man Titty (Orange)
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    8 - 9
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)

  • Wednesday 26 March

    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    13 - 15
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    11 - 6
    Lardiff City (Black)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    6 - 21
    Pork Vale (Blue)

  • Wednesday 12 March

    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    9 - 3
    Lardiff City (Black)
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    7 - 12
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    7 - 12
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)

  • Wednesday 05 March

    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    11 - 26
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    9 - 7
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    Lardiff City (Black)
    2 - 8
    Man Titty (Orange)

  • Wednesday 26 February

    Pork Vale (Blue)
    14 - 10
    Lardiff City (Black)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    5 - 18
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    12 - 6
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)

  • Wednesday 12 February

    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    6 - 7
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    Man Titty (Orange)
    9 - 11
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    11 - 7
    Lardiff City (Black)

  • Wednesday 05 February

    Lardiff City (Black)
    10 - 8
    Ivory Cheese Toastie (White)
    Pork Vale (Blue)
    10 - 8
    Kebaberdeen FC (Green)
    Queens Pork Roasters (Yellow)
    5 - 8
    Man Titty (Orange)